This is how we know who the children of God are and who the children of the devil are: Anyone who does not do what is right is not a child of God; nor is anyone who does not love his brother. . . Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. - 1 John 3:10, 18
While New Castle slogs through the heaviest snows of the winter season, I am in Florida with my parents. My father has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's and my local congregation has graciously allowed me to travel to Florida and help them navigate the trailhead of this new and uncertain journey.
As I learn about Alzheimer's and what is required of their caregivers, I'm realizing that my mom will not be able to walk this road alone. She will need respite from providing care. She will need sleep and good health. She will need a shoulder to cry on and friends who will listen. In short, she will need a loving community of support.
But the passage I began this article with, from John's first letter to the churches, leaves me with a nagging question: are our churches, in truth, loving communities of support?
I know we say we love each other. We say we are praying for each other, and prayer is certainly not passive or useless, but I wonder if that is the extent of our concern.
Some friends of mine were in the final days of a pregnancy when the first of these two snow storms rolled through Central Indiana. I know people were praying for them, but what they really needed was a snow plow. Two individuals offered to provide a snow plow, but fortunately my friends didn't need the snow plow; baby Cohen came between storms.
A pastor friend and his family is walking through the dark valley of the shadow of death and I know there are thousands of people praying for them, but is anybody providing care for them? I know of some that are.
Other people in this community are grieving the loss of a loved one and prayers have been said and continue to be said for those who grieve, but is anybody expressing their love for those who grieve in deeds and not just words?
DC Talk was right several years ago when they released a song called "Luv Is A Verb". Love isn't something we say, it's something we do. Love isn't something we feel, but something we WILL. Remember the classic wedding vows? For better or worse; in sickness and in health?
In better and healthy times it is easy to FEEL love. But in sickness and worse times we often must WILL ourselves to love.
This passage from 1 John challenges me. Am I truly loving or do I just say that I am loving? John is really saying, "Let your actions speak for themselves. Shut up and show that you love each other."
How do we know that Mother Teresa loved the people she ministered to? It's not because of her sermons or speaking ability. We know she loved the people of Calcutta because she gave her life for the dying and destitute of Calcutta. She didn’t have to say anything.
A friend of mine plowed my driveway three times this year, without me asking him to do it or expecting me to pay for it. I know he loves me and my family. My church gave me several days to travel to Florida so that I could express my love for my parents. I know that my church loves me and my family.
The question that haunts me today is, "If people only looked at what I did, and ignored what I said, would they think that I love them?"
Tomorrow is Valentine's Day and it is Sunday, a day when we celebrate the Author of Love. As we gather in our churches, will we heed John the Apostle's words? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.
Any questions or comments? Write me at curt@smdcog.org
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Thanks for reading!
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